How to Write an Obituary

What an obituary is

An obituary is a short written account of a person's life, usually published soon after they die. It is longer than a death notice, which only gives the facts and the funeral arrangements (see how to write a death announcement), and different from a eulogy, which is spoken at the funeral (see how to write a eulogy). An obituary is read, kept, and often passed around. It is the version of their life that people will remember reading.

What to include

• The announcement: their full name, age, and when and where they died.
• Where their life began: where they were born and grew up, and their family.
• The shape of their life: education, work, service, the places they lived.
• Who they were: what they loved, what they were known for, what made people smile.
• Their family: those who survive them, and those who died before them.
• The arrangements: the funeral or memorial service, and any wishes about flowers or donations.

A structure that works

Most obituaries follow the same order, and readers find it easy to follow. Start with the announcement. Then tell their life, roughly in time order, choosing two or three things that mattered most rather than everything they did. Spend a paragraph on who they were, with one specific detail (the garden they would not leave, the jokes they told badly). Name their family. Close with the arrangements.

Length depends on where it will appear. A newspaper obituary is often charged by the line or word, so families keep it to a few hundred words. Online, you can say more, but the best obituaries are still short enough to read in one sitting.

An example obituary

Margaret Hill died peacefully on 14 July, aged 78, with her family beside her.

Born in Leeds in 1948, Margaret trained as a nurse and spent thirty years on a children's ward, where a generation of parents knew her as the nurse who stayed past the end of her shift. She married Peter in 1971, and they made a home that was never without a visitor or a cake.

She loved her allotment, crosswords in pen, and a long walk with a flask of tea. She was quick to laugh and slow to judge, and she never forgot a birthday.

Margaret is survived by Peter, her children Sarah and James, and four grandchildren. The funeral will be held at the crematorium on 2 August at 11am. Family flowers only. Donations, if desired, to a children's hospice.

Tips for writing it

• Gather facts first. Dates, places and full names of family. Check spellings with relatives.
• Ask others. A friend, a colleague or a grandchild will remember things you do not.
• Be specific. One real detail says more than "kind and generous".
• Be honest. You do not need to include everything, but do not invent.
• Read it aloud, and ask one person to check it before it is published.

Where to publish an obituary

Local and national newspapers publish paid obituaries and death notices, and the funeral director can often arrange it. Many funeral directors also have a notices page on their own website. An online memorial lets you publish it once and share one link, with no limit on length, and lets family and friends add their own memories underneath.

If a blank page is too much

Answer a few questions about them, and Cherished Book's AI obituary writer drafts their life story for you to change, in the tone you choose. You keep what is right, change what is not, and it becomes a memorial everyone who loved them can add to.